Everything I try to feel better doesn't work. or it works for a couple days and then it doesn't anymore. Maybe I am just realizing that my mood and behaviour wasn't a side effect of being tired. Maybe I was using it as an excuse. The only thing I haven't done that I have wanted to is excercise but my knees are bothering me enough that I just can't.
I go to see the doc on the 27th and I will do whatever they tell me to. Drugs, therapy, anything.
I can't do this anymore. I can't be this person anymore. It's not fair to those who love me and it's not fair to myself. I wanted to fix myself by myself but I can't.
Good thing I have benefits at work.
Wednesday, April 15, 2009
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